Fruit Maven » fruit http://fruitmaven.com Your guide through the wild world of fruit. Tue, 07 Feb 2012 22:21:01 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 Fruit Ninja! http://fruitmaven.com/2010/06/fruit-ninja/ http://fruitmaven.com/2010/06/fruit-ninja/#comments Thu, 03 Jun 2010 15:14:39 +0000 Fruit Maven http://fruitmaven.com/?p=2197 Ahem…

Is this thing on? Testing. Testing. 1-2-3.

Right. So…. I have had my wrist slapped ever-so politely by a few people lately about the apparent abandonment of the old fruit blog.  So I am here to make it right. I have tons and tons of excuses. But seriously, SERIOUSLY – who cares? I’m here now. Let’s hug.

I have had some fruit since we last chatted but I didn’t take pictures and I don’t think it was that memorable. There were loquats, a fancy banana that really had no name, just numbers — something like B52 banana, various standard strawberries, etc.  You haven’t missed much. But summer is coming! Let the fruit gorging begin. I’ll be back (I hope).

For today, sadly, I have no fruit. BUT… I do have a super cool fruit app-game-thing for the iphone that has been using up a good portion of my non-existent free time (basically the time it takes to fast fwd the commercials on my DVR while watching Gossip Girl).  Anyway, the app!

fruit-ninja


If you don’t have an iphone then I feel a little sad for you and I offer this link, which is really just proof that iphone lovers are insane and prepared to kill you for showing your android or whatever it is that you have. For everyone else who remains safe to walk the streets, I give you FRUIT NINJA!





The next best thing to eating fruit, is hacking it up in a virtual game while you pretend you are a ninja. Believe me, it is crazy satisfying. You get different sound effects for the different fruit textures — more of low *thwack* for a banana versus a crazy *splurt* for a watermelon. It’s awesome. Also I hate watermelons and there are a lot of those, which I find particularly gratifying.  And when your game ends you get quirky Sensei fruit facts like this one:


The largest watermelon ever grown was 262 pounds!


Yeah – I dunno. They have a thing for watermelons. So whip out your wallet, spend the 99 cents and get to it. (I don’t know them or get anything from promoting this other than to get you people off my back for a while for lack of attention.)

Feel free to brag about your high score in the comments, but know that I will totally mock and judge you behind your back for being so geeky. My high score is 191 if you were wondering. Also, my nail polish is currently red.

]]> http://fruitmaven.com/2010/06/fruit-ninja/feed/ 2 Twelve Days of Fruit http://fruitmaven.com/2009/12/twelve-days-of-fruit/ http://fruitmaven.com/2009/12/twelve-days-of-fruit/#comments Wed, 23 Dec 2009 19:50:06 +0000 Fruit Maven http://fruitmaven.com/?p=1166 In honor of Christmas carols, I thought I would do a little something different today. Though really I shouldn’t because the back log of fruit at my house is making my family very grumpy and every time the refrigerator opens they are certain to tell me that something is fermenting in there. Not that I would ever review fermenting fruit, no. I’m just using dramatic wording to get my point across here. Settle down people. Settle down.

Now back to the point.

Christmas carols! I thought I would re-write the Twelve Days of Christmas with the fruit I want to find and eat next year. I would torture you with all twelve verses, but I am way too busy (and lazy) to do that much typing, cutting and pasting. So here is the last verse. Please sing along as that would make me extremely happy. In fact sing the whole song. (Also a note to my true love, who is specifically called out in the second line, pay attention here. This is next year’s Christmas list.)

On the twelfth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Twelve durians stinking
Eleven paw paws ripening
Ten peacotums peaking
Nine loquats dripping
Eight moros bleeding
Seven soursops sweetening
Six dates delighting
Five finger limes
Four miracle fruit
Three salmonberries
Two mangosteens
And a lilly pilly in a sweet jam.

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